Want to Try to Save Your Marriage?
How to Encourage Your Spouse to Go See a Marriage Counselor
It can be extremely difficult to get an unwilling spouse to go with your to see a
unless they are ordered by the court. When someone does not want to go, you cannot force them to. Plus, even when your spouse does agree to go with you, but is not willing to commit to change, counseling sessions will prove to be of little benefit.
In many cases, however, your spouse could just feel uncomfortable with the idea of speaking in front of a stranger about their problems. They could also feel like the counselor and their spouse is trying to gang up on them. In cases such as these, talking to your spouse about their reluctance to attend counseling could help to encourage them to at least try it first
Another good approach which can be helpful is asking your spouse to attend counseling sessions in order for them to help you. When your spouse doesn’t feel marriage counseling is going to end up being confrontational, and could, in fact, be of help to their spouse, then they could agree to go with no admission that either party contributes to the problems.
When one is already in counseling, the pitfall should be that their counselor is not their
marriage counselor
too. There would be a conflict of interest, and an already established rapport with a counselor may put the other spouse instantly on the defensive right from the start. If you already in counseling, ask your therapist who they can recommend that will
start fresh
with both you that will display no partiality.
Marriage counseling is only effective when both partners are willing, want to change and will listen to their respective partners. In lieu of counseling with a spouse who is reluctant, look for alternatives such as books, TV programmes, and tapes which may help your spouse feel more comfortable. Plus, still attend counseling privately, even when your spouse is not willing. At the very least, this give you somewhere you can talk about your hurt and frustration with any issues with your marriage, it could even help relieve some of the tension.
If you or your partner need to talk to someone in complete confidence, then call Linda L Anderson MS in Seattle, WA today on (206) 782-7448.